


Poultry Man Two: Electric Boogaloo

by CrazyCatMeow



Series: MC YouTube and HermitCraft one shots/ short stories [14]
Category: Hermitcraft
Genre: Crack, Gen, Poultry man is a ghost, Xisuma needs sleep, chicken Xb, confused Xisuma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:40:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27001360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyCatMeow/pseuds/CrazyCatMeow
Summary: What happens when you combine A superhero ghost that’s obsessed with chickens and a hermit obliviously wearing a chicken mask?
Relationships: Friendship - Relationship, nope
Series: MC YouTube and HermitCraft one shots/ short stories [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2117622
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	Poultry Man Two: Electric Boogaloo

Xisuma grins, he's standing in the shopping district, facing Xb, “You get another prize, you beat the chicken game so many times, you have earned this.”

Xb looks over and grins, “Really?”

“Yep, you must wear this until your next respawn,” Xisuma laughs as he hands over a chicken mask. It’s like a masquerade mask.

Taking the mask Xb shrugs and puts it on, “Hm, with how you said that I thought you would have put a curse of binding on it.”

“Not this time,” Xisuma explains, “Oh and don't kill any chickens with it on.”

“Ok? I don't know what's happening,” Xb admits with a nervous smile.

“It's fine just be nice to the chickens,” With that Xisuma grins and takes off, “Have fun.”

Waving as the admin flies off, Xb adjusts his new mask and continues on his way. It's a few days later when he runs into Grian. 

“Xb, where did you find that?” Grian asks motioning to the mask.

“Xisuma gave it to me. I beat his chicken game so he gave it to me,” Xb explains, as he nervously pushes the mask up, “Is something wrong?”

Grian shakes his head, “No, no, everything is fine.”

Nodding Xb picks his shulker up and wanders off in the direction of the Red Zone.

As he walks away Grian shudders slightly, “I hope it's fine,” He continues to the barge as he worries, “Let's just hope he’s not here,’’ Grian frowns, he takes off and flies towards Xisuma’s base. 

When he arrives, Xisuma runs out to meet him, “What can I do for you?”

“You gave Xb a chicken mask?” Grian asks nervously. 

“I did,” Xisuma confirms with a nod, “It didn't summon him, did it?”

“Not yet,” Grian mutters, “Just be prepared if he does show, he’s not going to be happy that Xb is impersonating him.”

“What would he do?” Xisuma asks, starting to regret giving him the mask.

“Most likely, chicken bomb his base,” Grian explains.

“Grian, I am so sorry,” Xisuma says, concern filling his eyes. 

“Naa, it's fine, I'm just worried about Xb.”

Nodding Xisuma in agreement, “I'll pull a tab up so I can monitor his code.”

“Thanks, X I suama Void.”

“No problem, Grain.” 

Grian laughs as he jumps off the platform and shoots a rocket off. Waving he calls back, “Be careful around chickens.“

“I will.”

As Xb lands on the roof of the barge, he rubs at the mask. Over the few days he’s been wearing it it's gotten more and more uncomfortable. He grumbles slightly as he hops down to get some dirt.

As he's looking around Ren pops in, “Hey Poultry Man.”

“Who?” Xb asks, confused as he shudders slightly, he feels some sort of energy pass through him.

Ren’s face drops a bit, “Sorry right you weren't there for that, Poultry Man was a superhero last season. He had a chicken mask and a trench coat. He was the protector of chickens and had chicken-related powers.”

“Ohh,” Xb murmurs, “You, though I was the Poultry Dude because of the mask.”

“Yeah,” Ren laughs, “It was pretty funny when he was on the server.”

A thud from outside draws their attention, looking at each other they run outside. Where they find Grian laying against a wall as a glowing spirit carefully shakes him. After a moment the spirit fades into Grian and he sits up, “Hello there, I'm the one you call Poultry Man.”

“Uh, Hi,” Xb waves as the possessed body of Grian stumbles forwards. 

“Sorry, it's been a while since I've been in an actual body. Thanks to you, Ren I'm back,” He turns to Xb, “As for you imposter… I've got something special planned.” 

Xb backs up a few steps, “What do you mean?”

“You’ll see,” With that Poultry, Man takes off towards Grian’s base.

Turning to Ren, Xb asks, “Do you know what he’s going to do?”

“Most of the time he just throws eggs at everything, but I think we should go to Xisuma. He did not sound happy.”

The conversation is interrupted by Xb’s communicator, “This can't be good.”

“What happened my guy?” Ren asks as he shoos Xb into the nether.

“Suma wants me to come to his base and with what just happened I can't imagine it's good.” 

“Xb, take the chicken mask off,” Ren says as he stops and squints at his face.

Carefully Xb reaches up to try and remove the mask, instead of gripping the edge of the smooth porcelain, his fingers are met by soft downy feathers. Stifling a screech Xb frantically tries to find the edge of the mask. Ren pulls his hands down, away from his face.

“Come on, let's go before Xisuma decides to teleport you.”

Xb pulls a face at that, “Yeah that's never fun.”

As they walk the feathers spread down his face a little; Xb decidedly ignores it. 

When they exit the nether in Xisuma’s base he’s waiting for them, “Are you alright?”

“For now,” Xb mutters as he pokes the spreading feathers.

Xisuma frowns and starts dragging Xb up into the heart of his base, “Thanks Ren,” He calls back.

Ren shoots him a thumbs-up as he fades back into the nether.

Turning his full attention to Xb, Xisuma carefully inspects the spreading feathers, “What happened?”

“Uh, Ren said the chicken dude’s name and he showed up, he possessed Grian. He got all offended when he saw my mask then he did this,” Xb gestures up to his head. 

Frowning Xisuma pulls him over to a bench, “It’s getting your hair.”

“What do you mean?” He asks his voice wavering as he starts to panic.

“The color is fading and it’s getting all feathery,” Xisuma explains. 

Xb makes a slight cooing noise, “I don’t like that.”

“Me neither,” Xisuma mutters as he plucks something off the counter, “Here, I want you to close your eyes and hold this.”

Nodding Xb except the seeds, “What’s this?”

“Open your eyes.”

As Xb looks at the seeds his feathers poof up a bit. His ears have started to flatten out by this point and he’s starting to get a little smaller. He carefully takes the seeds and impulsively eats them. 

Xisuma sighs, “Stay here tonight, it’s getting late and I don’t think you would make it back.”

Hesitantly Xb nods, “I don’t like this,” He whispers as Xisuma pulls out some blankets. 

Xisuma sits next to him and hugs him, “It’ll be ok. You go to sleep and I’ll try and fix this.”

As Xb starts falling asleep, Xisuma starts digging through piles of code. Occasionally looking back he sees the transformation starts to pick up speed.

Grumbling softly as not to wake him, Xisuma frowns. He’s going to need to find Poultry Man to be able to fix this.

As the sun rises Xisuma’s awoken by a loud panicked screech. He stumbles out of the admin panels and over to the panicking rooster, “Xb, that’s Xb,” Xisuma mutters to himself. 

He kneels next to the rooster and carefully pats his head before gently petting his back. Xb makes a quiet murrp sound and clucks quietly as he calms down.

Xisuma picks the confused chicken up and carries him over to the table.

Standing on shaky legs Xb, carefully attempts to walk. He has his wings spread out and is using them to balance. It’s not going too well and he keeps falling back down. 

Giving up on walking for now Xb decides to take a look at his much smaller body, his feathers are completely white and he has a red crest on the top of his head.

Blinking softly he looks up at Xisuma.

“Hey, I’m going to call Grian, he might be able to explain what he did without us having to summon him.”

Nodding Xb crows in agreement, he pecks at the table a little.

“Right, food. Uhhh, I don’t really know what chickens eat,” Xisuma mutters as he looks through his cabinets, “Do you want, uhh, blueberries? 

Xb nods nervously as he fluffs his feathers up.

Xisuma sets a small plate with a few berries on it in front of the newly turned chicken.

Xb carefully pecks at the berries as he slowly starts eating. 

Nodding Xisuma pulls his communicator out and messages Grian telling him to get over to his base.

A few minutes later Grian appears and instantly heads for Xb. “I’m so sorry about this.”

“Can you explain to me exactly what happened from your side?” Xisuma asks as Xb shuffles himself so he’s near Xisuma’s hand. He shoves his head under his palm and lets the tired admin pet him.

Grian nods, “I was flying to the barge to restock and he was summoned. I think it’s because when Ren said his name, you had the mask on so it worked. Anyway, he immediately tried to take over. He knocked me out of the air and then possessed me. After that is a bit fuzzy, I do remember he wasn’t happy about the mask.”

Petting Xb’s back Xisuma frowns, “Do you know how to fix this?”

Nodding Grian answers, “Yeah, it’s not going to be a full fix but it will help. You are going to need to talk to him, I can’t tell you the specifics of the spell.”

With a slight peep, Xb stands and walks over to Grian, where he promptly pecks the gremlin.

Grian stares at the rooster for a moment before rubbing his head, “Yeah I'll let him take control. Xisuma could you leave?”

The admin looks hesitant but leaves the room.

Wincing Grian lets Poultry Man take over his eyes shift from brown to a bright amber, “Aww, is my little chicky unhappy with my gift?”

Xb puffs up a little before answering, “Uh, it’s more confusing than anything.”

Poultry Man bursts out laughing, “Well, that’s a pretty good response. Most of the time it’s just turn me back!” 

“You do this often?”

“Oh, only to those who impersonate me.”

Blinking Xb stretches his wings out, “Aren’t you like a superhero?”

“Well, yes, but I don’t like being copied,” He pouts.

“What kind of chicken am I?”

“Your a leghorn,” He explains, “Do you want me to tell you how this spell works?”

Xb bobs his head, “That would be cool.”

“You're only a chicken right now because it’s the day after I cast the spell. You will turn back to normal tomorrow morning, here’s the catch, if someone kills a chicken around you you’ll turn back into this form. Since you’re actually talking to me you’ll be able to turn at will as well.” 

Clucking Xb stands up, “That’s a cool spell.”

“Isn’t it?” Poultry Man laughs, “I would completely undo it but, it’s not really possible. Anyways, bye.”

He turns back and fades out of Grian leaving a confusing gremlin. Xisuma walks back in a moment later.

They sit in silence for a while, Xb starts practicing walking around and is doing much better than before. The rest of the day is spent just relaxing and messing around. 

By the time he turns back, Xb’s pretty good at functioning as a chicken. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> What happens when you combine A superhero ghost that’s obsessed with chickens and a hermit obliviously wearing a chicken mask?
> 
> It equals no good.


End file.
